(The title of this series is shamelessly stolen from the title of a previous work by Phil Hine. Credit where credit’s due.)
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law
The following is part of a series I wrote a few years ago whilst quite new to a thelemic order, and as I was forming a relationship to its central philosophy. How did I relate to this? Is the law really for all and if so what is the sexual ethic of a new day?
This is a picture of a patch I got ages ago (I really need to find something to sew it onto)
Desire is something that I feel is very problematic to analyse or politicise. I had an experience when I was a teenager, when I was confused about sexuality and identity, wondering if I was feeling certain things because of this or that or the other, when I stepped back and said – “you know what? It doesn’t matter. These are my desires at the moment and that’s all I need to know”. This was a liberating realisation for me at the time and allowed me to explore my identity without going crazy with over thinking everything.
I am going to talk about something I think about a lot, and especially recently as I’ve been reading a few anti-trans blogs and articles* (mainly because I like the mental exercise it gives me, and to understand why people think the way that they do).
The main argument against people transitioning, from a certain kind of feminist point of view, seems to be that gender is socially constructed – that when female bodied people talk about “feeling male” that what they really mean is that they are more comfortable with the male social role than the female (and also that they have been taught to hate their female body by a misogynistic culture). They claim that the problem is the limitations of the social roles of gender – that if these roles were broken down then people would be happy being in whatever social role they fitted into best and not feel the need to change their body or to identify as a gender different to the one assigned to them at birth.
Let me tell you the story of a Druid camp I went to one Beltaine not so many moons ago.
The site was on a river bend and the stars glittered at night. People were friendly and glad to be outdoors. In the evenings, around a roaring fire, they told stories and made music. A talented and bardic crowd; the camp was run by a Druidic couple, both with long flowing hair. He had a long flowing beard too, and a cloak of feathers, she sported a large brooch and dress of velvet. Most of the people at the camp were in boy/ girl couples and had children with them. Not my usual magical crew. Still, I thought – it’s good to be open to possibilities.
As a young transsexual, I was in a rather unusual position. After I first went to the doctors at the age of 16 to tell him that I was transsexual and I wanted to be referred to the relevant people, I had a wait of two and a half years before I even saw anyone. Although this was very difficult at the time I am now very glad of what this un-influenced, uninterrupted time gave to me. I went into a period of deep self discovery, it was a very exciting process for me and it taught me a lot. Continue reading →